WHYYYYYYY?

Why did I do this? Why am I trying to blog everyday? Sure, I missed a couple of days, but I've been faithful to my blogging from then on and now feel the need to blog today, even though I have nothing to talk about; not really.

So feel free not to read this, because it's going to suck.

Okayyy, so yesterday I must admit that I failed to do what I had intended to:

- I did not study and did not do my homework (my excuse is that I cannot find my homework, but then again, I did not look for it, so...)

- I did not go to the library and therefore will have to panic over not being able to do a work experience and therefore fail at life. I think maybe if I went to the council with proof of ID, they could give me my pin, but I don't know. I still think none of this would have happened if we had gotten our pins sooner, and then I could have asked teachers why I am not being able to access the website.

Buuut, at least I can say that I roughly know most of my French, so I won't fail too much the oral. Yay.

Also, I helped out in the garden yesterday. I trimmed the flower things we have, and had to cut off the dead flowers. It was oddly soothing, because it was really straightfoward, and I could do it without thinking.

Therefore, I think you can all guess what I did. That's right: I thought of my story.

It's really beginning to piece together, and I, to my surprise, am not sick of it as of yet. I hope that doesn't change too. Also, I usually know how stories end, and work my way back, but I don't really know this time. I mean, I had ideas, but they may change as I develop my characters more.

I'm bored now, going to write more of my story.

All my love, Merani.

I lied... sowry.

Yeah, dat's right. I lied. Sorry.

Turns out although me and my friends are delightfully lazy, we are also exceedingly immature, so yes, we did jump around and roll down hills and dance under blossom trees while the petals fall down, crying, "It's like our wedding!".

I filmed some of it too, but I'm too lazy to edit it now, lalalala.

(after spending ten minutes finishing her fruit smoothie and catching up on Youtube subscriptions, Melanie carries on blogging...)

Woah, sorry, forgot about this tab for a second there.

Okay, what else happened yesterday...

Oh yes! (That's what she said.)

After we got tired of the park, we went back to Sophie's house for a bit, watched TV and did magazine crosswords, before Sophie announced that she had to do her paper round. Lauren had already agreed to helping her, but my mum wasn't there yet, so I said I'd help out.

It was actually kind of fun.

The sun was low and the sky was beginning to get orange, casting this warm glow on the streets and we went round putting The Leader in people's letter boxes (--fun fact! I've been on the cover of said newspaper twice, playing my trumpet. See, our school did an experimental thing where Year 5, or 4th grade, I think, play brass and percussion instruments for a term, just to, widen our possibilities, I think... But yeah, I played it for another year or so when I decided I didn't like it anymore, and that I wanted to save money for my parents and shiz, so, yeah. Pity, because I miss it).

The houses were intimidatingly big, and I can see why Sophie found it scary to do her paper round in the dark, because they look fairly old, and have ivy crawling up the brown brick walls, and have driveways bigger than my living room.

It was a good experience, and I felt very American, to say the least.

Today, I do nothing. I will probably go to the library and see if I can do work experience there since the website still won't let me do it online, and then if the nursery is open, I'll try there. Also, revision and homework day! Yaaaay!

All my love, Merani.

What is this SUN you speak of?

Srsly though; third day we've had of really nice weather. It's outrageous. Actually makes me want to go outside and do something with my miserable existence, y'know?

I actually did yesterday; went for a walk with my mum. Discussed:

- Life.

- George and Leah and my issues with them.

- School.

- History of Medicine.

And I'm not even joking with that last one. I told her loads about what we're studying in History atm, and she seemed content to just listen to me talk about how King James died. I mostly did the talking tbh, but it was nice to just talk and talk and talk endlessly for once.

But, I'm not here to talk about that! I'm here to talk about what's happening today.

Today me, Lauren, Kate and Sophie are having a picnic at Hove Park. And I'm quite looking forward to it, tbh; the only time I only ever have picnics are with my mum, who always gets annoyed at the fact that me and my brother are happy to just sit there and read, as opposed to, I dunno, getting up and playing 'It' --or 'Tag'. I mean, that's just ridiculous; we're not from her generation for Chris'sake.

And well, my friends and I are delightfully lazy, so I doubt we'll be made to jump around and play hide and seek; we'll probably just sit and bitch for hours. I don't mind; just sitting outside and soaking in the sun sounds delicious right now anyway.

Oh! And just read Lauren's blog. Turns out she's bringing BUBBLES :DDD The child in me rejoices much so.

Short because now I have to go make food. May add onto this later.

All my love, Merani.

Another bloggy blog!

Yay for consistency!

Not much to say about today except for the fact that I woke up at around five in the morning to throw up the remains of my dinner from the night before, and to sit there and cry at the pains situated at my stomach (or womb, if you're gonna get technical).

On a lighter note, I was able to sleep fairly well despite my cramps, and I believe if it had not been for them, I would have had a normal night's sleep. So I guess I'm over Paranormal Activity already, which has been unusually quick.

So far today I've:

- Cancelled my plans.

- Ate some plain toast.

- Watched V for Vendetta again, and tried very hard not to fangirl every time V appears/speaks/breathes/does anything, since my brother was in my company.

Because of all my other blog posts, I'm finding it very difficult not to talk about my life in bullet point lists, but I'll fight to urge.

Anyway, I feel I should release an excerpt of my story, and at least talk about the characters, although anything I have established is subject to change. As John Green said, you can only write a good book on revision, and revision, and that usually 90% of the first draft is deleted in the process of writing. Still, I like what I have so far.

Okay, here we go:

Her mother’s hand slipped into hers as they got out of the taxi and into the crisply cold air. Heathrow was alight and inside there were people inside bustling around despite it being the wee hours of the morning. Erin rubbed her eyes and smiled at her.

The taxi driver cleared his throat behind them, their luggage at his feet.

Erin watched as her mother turned away from her, thanked him, shaking his hand, her face glowing with a smile. The man bashfully scratched his head, and offered to help with putting them in a trolley.

Unsure, she turned to Erin for support. Erin shrugged in return, and so his offer was accepted.

Erin clenched and unclenched her hand as her mother gently let go of it, then stuffed in her coat pocket to keep it warm.

Usually, she would have assured the man that they could manage, would politely dismiss him and then began to juggle the luggage awkwardly with her mother.

But not today.

Today was different.

Basically, we have our main character, Erin.

Because she's British, she's relatively pale, and has dark brown and slightly curly or wavy hair; it depends on the brush she uses in the morning, or if she uses one at all. It's not too short or too long; she likes to keep it at a practical length. It just reaches her shoulders, because she usually has it up in a ponytail to keep it out of the way. She has a full block fringe, and thick black eyelashes.

Average height, weight, and gets by in school well, but is more interested in music. Has played guitar since she was eleven years old, and a pink one at that; it has butterflies all over it, and she write snippets of her favourites songs onto it. Her all time favourite by the way, is Kiss Me by Sixpence None the Richer. She sings too; her voice a mix between Avril Lavigne and the girl from Hey Monday.

She has a boyfriend, Jacob, and is in a band with him. Or was, until she went to Australia in the summer.

Basically, what happened is her parents were arguing all the time and they decided to take a break from each other*, and so her mother is going to Australia to visit and stay with her best friend, who is also Erin's godmother, for an unknown amount of time.

Erin, who has always received endless amount of support from her mother and has a strong bond with her, decides to accompany her; it'll give her time to think about the future and help her forget about Jacob and their break up. They were childhood sweethearts, and it was kind of weird to imagine not going out with him.

She is 17 and was about to start anew with her going to Uni anyway; another reason for her to go to Australia with her mother.

Oh! And she has a half sister; the daughter from her father's first wife.

I also like the relationship that Erin's parents have. I based the mother on myself, so she has lots of my traits, but she is also more focused on schoolwork and it much more secluded, keeping to herself most of the time.

Her parents met when they were fifteen, but they barely talked at the time. To him, she was just that quiet girl in his Maths class who could do Pythagoras. She was nice, but she certainly didn't talk much. It wasn't 'til that day when he was kept behind to talk to his English teacher after class that he saw her differently.

There she sat at the bus stop, reading a book, as usual, wearing a beige coat, a red scarf around her neck and matching red gloves. He walked over to her, confused.

As he walked, she noticed him too. She looked up and smiled at him, and it was then he realised she was pretty. She explains that because she takes a public bus home, it doesn't always come closely after three, and usually comes at half past.

Anyway, he stays behind a little everyday from then on just to sit at the bus stop and talk to her. She was interesting to talk to and he liked knowing a little bit more of what went on inside that quiet girl's head.

Eventually, one day, the last day before the end of the term, he kisses her. The bus arrives as he does and she jumps, startled, and gets on it. He watched as she sits down inside, flustered, tucking her hair behind her ear furiously. She looks out the window and meets his gaze, but sharply looks back down, opening her book and blocking out the world.

When he returns, he discovers that she has moved, to Australia. He finally understands why she looked so sad in that split second that she was looking straight into his eyes.

They meet again, a few years later, when is studying Journalism at the local University, and he is out with one of his friends. She is outside the coffee shop, on the phone.

He, alarmed, stands up at the sight of her, scaring his friend. He explains who she is; she used to go to secondary school with him, she used to be in his Maths class, and when he was fifteen she became his first love.

He goes outside, and they talk and arrange to see each other later that day.

They go on the date, and at the end of the night, end up sleeping together. It's a blissful oblivion; he can never remember when he was ever close to being this happy.

It's then that his ex decides to call him, announcing she is pregnant.

He leaves in the morning before she wakes up, leaving a note apologising.

When she calls him later that day, her voice trembling because she is in tears, he is hesitant, but tells her the truth: his ex-girlfriend is pregnant and he is going to marry her. She hangs up.

It's years later when they meet again, him in his late 20's, and he's taking his daughter, Georgia to school when he sees her. She's there, at that very bus stop, that very same bus stop from all those years ago, and she's reading, just as she would have been doing back then.

He approaches her slowly, she sees his shoes, but doesn't want to look up. He witnesses her jaw tighten and her hand twitch. He greets her; she says nothing. He says her name again, tenderly this time; she blinks. He calls her again, and she whips her head round, snapping, "What?!" at him.

He kisses her.

Long story short, he is divorcing his wife, and they start dating. On their seven month anniversary, she, her eyes swimming with tears, but this time she's smiling, tells him the good news; she's pregnant.

Then, little Erin is born, and he got full custody of Georgia; him and Erin's mother eventually marry.

And that's all I'm want to give away for now. I really like all my characters and like the stories they have, particularly Erin's parent's --who, yes, at the moment have no names--, because it's so super sweet.

I'll get into Erin and her love interest's story very soon.

All my love, Merani.

*Not sure if they are divorcing, or just separating at this moment in time. Bare with me.

Being a woman...

...Is not pleasant, I'll tell you that now to any form of the male species. And neither are stomach cramps. What did I do to deserve this.

To top it all off, I couldn't get to sleep 'til around quarter past four in the morning, because I was paranoid about doing so due to Paranormal Activity. I swear, I'm not even that frightened, it just left me listening out for noises in my house more than I should. Got about 5 hours sleep. So. Tired.

Okay, but enough about that. Let's just catch up on my oh-so-exciting life in this bloggy post, shall we? Yay for bullet point lists!

- I did my German Oral exam before the Easter Holidays, and when we finished, my teacher said she would estimate that at around an A/A* standard, which is fantastic! :D Especially since a lot of people didn't do as well in that test; for example, boy in my class got told he would be lucky to receive a C. Ouch.

- I watched V for Vendetta and since then has forever my life changed. For the better. I love V so much. So. Attractive. In the opening scene, where he saves Evey, he gives her a little speech, that goes as following:

"Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin van-guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. "

And it carries on... But still, is that just not beautiful? We were having dinner as we watched it, and I recall my mouth just hanging open in awe. Srsly, I have a thing for guys that are smooth and suave already, but guys that have good vocabulary just sway me completely, and V's vocabulary is outstanding, therefore I love him.

On the whole though, the film is cleverly pieced, and is very slick. The violence is tasteful and the characters are normal people --except for V, who is unhumanly perfect.

My favourite film so far in all my years.

- I had a Tetanus jab. My arm hurt for a few days, but it was fine apart from that.

- I have added more detail to my story, fleshing out more characters and giving them memorable traits and back-stories. Funny, because at first I was bitter at the fact that I had to add more people to the story, but now I really love all of them. They have their flaws, but I want to put across that feeling that they all care deeply for each other, and that they are all connected somehow. Like Harry Potter, if I'm being frank, because that's kind of my inspiration.

- That's about it.

All my love, Meranil.

Making mistakes, and like Kristina Horner, calling this BMFM.

...And that stands for 'Blogging More Frequently Month', because there is no I will be able to succeed to blogging everyday in a month. Because --wow, here I'd like to say that it's due to me being in possession of what is called a 'life'-- I have to revise and because I'm so boring, I have nothing to blog about. Ever.

Today, however, is an exception.

I slept round Sophie's house yesterday. It was fun, as it usually is. Though, rarely to we ever leave the play room, or do anything besides drink hot chocolate and watch films, and ramble on pointlessly --which, by the name of my blog, you should know is my expertise.

So, carrying on. We --DUN DUN DUN-- watched Paranormal Activity. PARANORMAL ACTIVITY.

Now, from how I write, and from my interests and from how I tell you I spend my time, you should know that I'm not cool. I'm pretty lame and non-exciting by how my generation goes. I have never gone out to a party and gotten drunk, never tried any drugs and have never even gotten close to any kind of sexual activity, and couldn't even if I wanted to.

So, that being said, that also means I am a huge scaredy-cat. I do not, repeat, do not, like scary films. I lost nights of sleep with Scary Movie 3, and with the trailer for The Fourth Kind. I am not good with scary films, or just frightening things in general; such as, extreme rollercoasters and etc.

But, for some reason, before I knew it, I had found myself sitting in that living room, along with Sophie's family, totally engrossed on what was happening to Micah and Katie.

You would like me to describe the film, I presume? Sure, I'd rather erase the incident and forget the feature film, but getting it out of my system would be good too.

Okay, basically, I only tuned in about 15 minutes maximum into the film, so, from what I know, Micah and his girlfriend Katie, live in an abnormally large house for two people who are not married and are not planning a family, but I digress; they talk to this guy, whose name I've forgotten, about the strange banging noises they hear at night.

The man is a specialist in the matter of haunted houses and suchlike, and proceeds to ask more about the couple, and if such things have happened to them in the past. It has, to Katie, when she was eight and then later when she was thirteen.

The man comes to the conclusion that it could either be a demon or a ghost, and that it is not a problem with the house, but rather Katie; the thing seems rather fond of her, following her throughout all these years.

Katie decides the thing does not "feel human", so therefore it is a demon.

Er... after that there are a few nights where weird things happen. 22 nights, to be exact, are shown throughout the course of the film.

In the beginning, it is nothing too harmless. Mostly, the monster causes the door to sway slightly; takes over Katie's body for a few occasions, and she gets out of bed, and stands there, rocking slightly but apart from that, never moving, and she does so for hours, never remembering doing so in the morning.

As the film goes on, the 'demon' gets more and more involved, and Micah, determirned to prove himself as a man, lays traps, films the room as the sleep, and googles a lot.

One of the traps includes laying flour on the floor to see its footsteps? I dunno, thinking about it now, what purpose would that serve? But, yes, the demon does step in it, and the wake up to see the foot prints form. The foot consists of the three toes, supposedly, and is relatively webbed from what we can see.

Furthermore, Micah buys a ouija board, and leaves it in the house while he and Katie go out. When they return, and watch the tape, they see it spontaneously bursts into flames.

But yes, the film progresses, Katie continues to get possessed by the demon on nights, and even gets dragged out on bed on one, and the demon's presence in the house becomes more pronounced, even during the day, because Katie can feel it breathing on/watching her. Also, one night it runs in the room, slams the door, then runs into the attic. Micah goes up to explore, and finds a burnt picture. Katie hysterically claims that she has not seen said picture in fifteen years, proving further that the demon has been following her.

How does it end? Freakily, I'l tell you that much. The demon drags Katie out of bed again and she shrieks the house down, calling Micah. He springs surprisingly quickly into action, running after the demon. Because the camera only films the room, we do not see anything, but again, hear the thumps and thuds and screams of Micah and Katie.

Then, it falls silent.

Suddenly, more thuds and the audience, by this point, knows the sound well; the demon is walking up the stairs. Or so we think.

Out of nowhere, Micah's body is flung at the camera, and Katie emerges behind him, zombie-like. She approaches his body, kneels over him, and appears to bite his arm. Then, once again, she acknowledges the camera, which is now on the floor. She smiles; almost fondly, and it wouldn't be spine-chilling if we didn't know that it's not Katie who is smiling at us, but the demon. She lunges at the camera, and the screen goes dark.

Before the credits, two sentences appear. One, stating the date the police found Micah's body. The second, appears later, eerily stating that Katie's whereabouts remain unknown.

So wow, long blog post. My opinion on the film? Sure, I did not fall asleep with ease that night, and probably will not tonight. But, all the way through, one can find ways of how this could have been faked; someone could have easily have pulled the covers off and simply hid from the camera's eye, for example. Also, I am not sure I believe in such things as demons, and etc. Ghosts, yes. I am oddly attracted to the idea of communicating with a ghost, but not in the sense of, let's say, a ouija board, but more like having a chat, y'know? Like, for example, conversing with the ghost of Shakespeare seems nice, does it not? Interesting, even.

However, yes, the film at times is scary, but it is hard to believe at times as well, because of the convenience of the camera being there.

I admit, yes, it is cleverly done at times too. The fact it is done through a home-video camera does make it more life-like, relatable, and the Katie and Micah do seem just like normal people. Athough at times, everyone in the room agreed that Micah's behaviour is suspicious; why is he so interested in the demon? Why can't he just let his girlfriend call the demonologist, and exorcise the damn house? I doubt any of this would have happened if they had just contacted Dr. Avery in the first place.

Conclusion: more creepy and twisted than scary. And, so far, very overrated. Not as scary as I had anticipated, but more eerily confusing than I hoped for.

All my love, Merani.

PS. I watched the changed ending, not the one that gave a 23 year old man a heart attack or caused three people to commit suicide after watching the film, so yeah.

why hello blog, how are you?

Ahhh I'm ze most terrible blogger ever. I was going to write this post yesterday, but didn't. I'm sorry. No, I'm not sorry, but for not being sorry, I am sorry.

Thing is, my life is kinda sucking atm. Srsly.

I just feel like I'm dragging on, wondering 'What's the point?'. I think it's because of all the exams that are thrusting themselves upon me and making me wonder why I only took academic subjects. Even subjects I don't care about, like R.E., I still don't want to fail in, because then I can't go to my school's sixth form college, and then I won't be able to study what I want, then I won't be able to go to a University that I want to go to, and then I won't get an English degree, and then I won't be a writer, and then I'll die.

See? This is why I didn't want to blog atm. It's all ranting, ranting, ranting and crying, crying, crying.

I think I'm going through that awkward emotional stage of adolescence, where life is just eurrggghhh. Tests, and talks about future, and having to decide NOW what you want to be before it's too late, and every little step you take is affecting how your life is going to turn out. Or maybe that's just me.

What I do know is that pretty much everyone I know is feeling kind of 'mergh' too, which helps. Even Kate's friend Jackie, who doesn't go to our school, is feeling rather defeated lately. That was reassuring.

I guess a good way to describe is that I've just given up. All my life, I've had not problem working hard, and did all my homework and never had to study too much before a test because I knew it, because I had paid attention in class.

But now, I seem to be questioning when I'll need to know, for example, that potassium when burnt gives a lilac flame, as a writer, meaning that I only taken in certain things that amuse me in class. I always regret it later, of course, when I'm having to learn all of these science equations for a test, when I know that after the test, I will never have to know the information again. It's a rebellious phase of sorts, it's just a bit late I guess.

I feel so lazy lately as well. Not necessarily physically either, because I've always been that kind of lazy. I mean, the type when if there's no conversation in a room, it's strenuous to have to muster up the energy to start one; I'm perfectly comfortable to wallow in the silence and make silly fanfiction in my head.

Which is why I was glad to have a really lazy, comfy weekend. It's actually gone quicker as well, and I've literally done nothing. I've read fanfiction, I've video surfed on Youtube and I've watched TV. But, it's been one of the best weekends I've had in a long time.

So, nothing new with me, apart from the mild depression I guess, and some other things.

1) Good fanfiction right here, if you were inclined to know more about SPOILERS Ted and Victoire from DH: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4473801/1/The_Start. It made me fall in love with Ted Lupin so, so much. He's adorable. It's eleven chapters, and usually I wouldn't have bothered, I did, because I like the way it's written, and how it's not BLATANTLY obviously that they're gonna hook up. I mean, we know because of DH, but it's the build up that's nice. It's like an actually funny romcom, y'know? Also, it's a prequel, meaning there's a one after this one, as well as a sequel after that. Should keep me occupied for a while.

2) Saw Alice in Wonderland. Dressed up. People stared. Was cool. Srsly though, the film was very good. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Sure, didn't really like how the plot was all centered about the Jabberwocky --which did NOT look like a proper Jabberwocky, but it was voiced by Christopher Lee, so I forgive Tim Burton for his mistake, and also, it suited the look of the film more-- but I digress. I really wanted more Hatter/Alice moments too, but, they did depict it very brotherly like. Disappointing, because I am a fan of bri-chan's works on dA, and her fanfiction, linked here.

3) Writing more Jim Hawkins and Alyssa fanfiction, who is my character, in my head. And some more of my Erin and Ethan story. Still don't know what to name her, because Erin and Ethan sounds a little corny, because they have the name first letter. But I like their chemistry and Ethan is just so cuuuute.

4) Did my Science exams, and possibly failed Physics. If I get a B, I'll live, but a C, then I'll re-take it. Maybe re-take it even if I get a B, because getting an average of A for Science would be nice~

5) Am reading the Harry Potter books for avidly and trying to get more involved in the fandom and community. Srsly, my HP love has suddenly multiplied itself, much to the annoyance of people like Leah, who hasn't read any and rarely has any idea what I'm talking about to Kate, Lauren, Emily or Ciara, when I have deep discussions about hidden meanings and things. Thing is, it's probably what's keeping me relatively sane and from having a complete breakdown. I mean, I have mini ones, over both HP and life itself, but I'm okay for now. Having a therapist wouldn't be too bad either though.

6) Counting down the days 'til EXPO in May! I wish Lauren and Sophie were more into anime too, because having them there too would make it so, so much fun. Not that I'm complaining, it'll be epic either way. I'm going as Sailor Jupiter and Kate's going as Sailor Saturn, whose character design I love love love. I cannot wait.

7) That's it now.


I wish you all a long and happy life, Merani.